State Fairs and The Art of Picking a Bottle

So you're tired of drinking the same five dollar jug wine you've been buying once a week for the last three years. You want to branch out. You love your jug wine and I understand. No judgment. While I don't order Old Style at a craft beer bar, I can certainly get down with it on a hot summer day at Wrigley Field. Booze is situational and your jug wine is to you like that blue blanket is to Linus. Nobody else may understand why, and people might find it somewhat creepy, but you get it and that's all that matters.

But when it's time to lay the jug to rest, how do you go about branching out? There's no right way, and that non-answer answer shouldn't come as a surprise if you read my first entry. You could do research, but who has time? You could get a bottle that is highly scored, but that just means SOMEBODY really likes it, not necessarily you (although there's a catch to this point...read on, please). What to do?

First of all, decide what you're willing to pay. It's really true, that there is a noticeable quality difference between wines under $10 and wines over $10. Most of the time. That's not to say you can't find quality cheap wines. But if you are going to play the random bottle game, you are most likely going to be more successful if you have say $15 on you. The random bottle game is this: I want a red wine, I have $15, I will pick the first $15 red wine I see. This can work with any type of wine or price range. You might be disappointed, but hey, you could just as easily be disappointed by that 92 point wine that you just dropped $35 on.

There are variations on the random bottle game. You could play the "Gee, this label is pretty" variation. You could play the, "My Unrequited Love's Initials" variation, where let's say you are in love with a girl name Betty, so you find a bottle of Benzinger or Beringer, bring it home and sob uncontrollably as you drink straight from the bottle screaming, "WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME BETTY?!!?" You could bring a baseball to the liquor section of your local grocery store, pretend you are playing a carnival game and randomly heave the ball, and whichever bottle breaks first is the one you choose...that is, after sprinting away to a different store where you haven't committed a crime. Destruction of property is pretty douchy, though, so don't do that one. Somebody's gotta clean that up, jerk!

You could just go to a friendly wine store and ask the clerk/owner for their advice. The friendly wine store that I go to has been very helpful on this front. I have gone in and said, "I'm interested in a red from California for less than $20. Whatta you got for me?" They've never steered me wrong. In fact they once even steered me away from paying too much for a white Bordeaux in favor of a white varietal that I had never tried, which was in fact cheaper. Get to know people like this!

But maybe you don't have a friendly wine store and you find yourself in one of those huge liquor emporiums that are as warm and welcoming as the drill bit section of a hardware store. Now what?

These places are a bit overwhelming, so if you don't feel like playing the random game, I suggest at least going in with a vague idea of a plan. I would like a Riesling from Washington. Find the aisle with Rieslings from Washington, take a look at bottles, prices, and at some point decide to put your faith in the random game.

I'll tell you what happened to me just the other day in one such store. I came in with a pretty clear cut plan. The one winery that stuck out from my recent trip to Napa was Regusci. It's a small operation that's got a welcoming, rustic, homey feel. At the entrance to the winery, you'll find Trixie the dog (that's her in the picture to the left, standing guard over Regusci's winery), lazing by the door, living perhaps the most perfect life that any living thing could possibly achieve--laying around in wine country, getting the occasional belly rub by visitors. Sounds good to me! And then there's Neal (or perhaps Neil...never found out), the kilt wearing Brit, who will guide you through an educational barrel tasting, complete with descriptions of the wine and wine making process that can best be described as "colorful". He will call you and your group "pigeons", you will laugh, you'll actually learn something, and you will enjoy every minute of it! This experience is one of the inspirations for this very blog.

So the people at Regusci said that I'd be able to find a couple of their wines at this particular gigantic liquor emporium here in Chicago. I walked aisle by aisle through the California section and found no sign of it. I went to their "Wine Information" table and waited a minute or two for somebody to appear, but they never did. I was now on my own.

Plan B for my bottle selection was to find a Viognier (a refreshing alternative to Chardonnay. I'll put a link at the bottom if you want to know more about this great varietal), which also brought back memories of my Napa trip. I found a bottle by one of the wineries I visited, but at $80, it wasn't speaking my language. Time to fall back on our old friend, the random game.

You'll find many ratings in these big stores. It's one of the main ways they push certain wines. So and so gives it an 89+ and detects notes of fennel, cardamom, cassis, and roasted peach pits and would pair it with a glazed rack of wild boar. You can't help but almost want to buy one of these highly rated wines, because, well 90 points must me good right? But I ask you to resist temptation. Unless...

I ended up finding a Viognier for $9.95 that had been rated 98 points! One of the things you should know about wine ratings, is that cheap wines are rarely scored over 90 points by anyone. I have a feeling this has something to do with intense snobbery because of the image of the elite great wines that don't go for less than $75 a bottle. Usually more. But come on, why are ALL the inexpensive wines at 89 points? Someone surely must like it more than this but is afraid to get sneered at. And even rarer, is ANY wine receiving a score over 95. Suddenly, I wanted to know more.

The 98 points and double gold medal winning status of this wine were given at the California State Fair! I love it! Let me just say here that I've been to the Illinois State Fair once or twice in my life and have a certain mental image of what it is like. I'm not sure how accurate that image is, considering I haven't been to one in years, I may be confusing some of my county fair imagery with my state fair imagery (two similar, yet vastly different beasts), and the late David Foster Wallace once wrote a laugh out loud funny essay on the Illinois State Fair and my brain may have co-opted some of his images. And yes, I'm pretty sure the California State Fair is probably a lot different than the Illinois State Fair, but still, state fair's are about as non-snobby as you can get. I have memories of constant smells of fried food and/or livestock or some combination of the two, sights of farmers in their overalls standing by their tractors, sounds of cheering for the pig races. Pig races! I won a cheap plastic Illinois State Fair piggie bank once for betting on the winning pig. Countless other agricultural displays and displays celebrating all things non-urban (and there are a lot of them) about the State of Illinois. And I'm pretty sure REO Speedwagon somehow plays every state/county fair in the country and they have been for the past 25 years! And people like it!

So the probably inaccurate picture that I imagine is of an unpretentious scene such as this: A panel of regular Californians (possibly in overalls) sampled a bunch of wine, and just stated simply, "Hey this is really good!" and stamped it with a 98 point seal of approval, without either realizing or caring that the wine critic world at large would never dare commit such a faux pas!

And so, I bought the bottle of 2009 McManis Family Vineyards California Viognier, and you know what? It is good! Really easy drinking. Great in the summer I'm sure, but equally great with my spinach & artichoke chicken Lean Pocket.

My advice on picking a bottle of wine? Take chances and be on the look out for unexpected recommendations. The more unpretentious the better. I was willing to spend a lot more money that day, but managed to pick up a bottle that I really liked for a lot less all because the state fair liked it! This enthusiastic rating from a delightfully unexpected source piqued my interest. And when you're enthusiastic about something, why wouldn't you give it a score like 98? It drives me crazy when a critic seems to really, really like something, but then scores it something that doesn't seem to match the visceral reaction. Whether it's wine, music, or otherwise. Really good things deserve really good ratings. Don't overthink it.

Anyhow, my point is that if you feel yourself drawn to a wine for its particular unique rating, or pleasant-looking label font, or clever name, or whatever may be that initial visceral connection, I say go for it! You've bonded somehow on some mysterious cosmic level. Wouldn't ad execs love to know everyone's personal cosmic purchasing triggers? Strangely, the connection between racing livestock and wine worked for me. Whatever it may be for you, follow through and enjoy. Have fun with it! That's what it's about, my friends!

http://www.enjoyingviognier.com/
http://www.regusciwinery.com/
http://www.mcmanisfamilyvineyards.com/

Wine is Fun...

Wine is fun. It's true. Don't let anyone tell you differently.

Wine really doesn't need me to advocate for it. It's doing just fine. In fact, we Americans are drinking more wine now than even the French. And that's what the French do...wear berets, eat baguettes, watch Jerry Lewis movies, look down upon everyone, but especially uncultured Americans, and drink wine! Maybe you are drinking wine right now. That would be a spectacularly appropriate thing to do while reading a wine blog! If you're not, somebody somewhere surely is drinking a glass and/or whole bottle of fermented grape juice.

And really that's all it is. For as much as people make of it, and pay for it, and speak in hushed tones in fine dining establishments about it, at its core, it's only grape juice.

But be careful, this is one of the common lines of the wine snob in hiding. I've heard it a couple of times from people. They try to play it cool and make you believe that they are really and truly, actually low-key and easy-going about wine, but then they turn around and insult your unrefined palate. See, it's not cool to be a snob. Who's going to come right out and say, "I'm a big time snob who knows SOOOO much about wine and am going to laugh at your lack of refinement and love of grocery store wines with animals on the label." Some might come right out and say it, but most people like having friends. Don't get me wrong, there are certain unabashed wine snobs who aren't afraid to tell you how you aren't nearly as good of a taster as them. I've met someone who said these exact words. As egomaniacal and off-putting as that sort of elitism is, it's almost more respectable than the people who try to cover up their snobbery.

And it's because of people like this that the wine world, despite wine's popularity, seems so inaccessible and unwelcoming to most people. Answer this question for me that was recently posed in a bit on Conan O'Brien's show: In America, do we drink wine or beer? You know the answer, I know the answer. And I love beer! I do. But why is beer so popular? It's unpretentious. It's versitile. You can drink it at home while watching a ridiculous TV show, at the bar with your buddies, at a sporting event, and it pairs well with everyday affordable food. And it's marketed as the "everyman's" drink. And it has been for ages.

Wine has an image problem in this country, which is too bad. Some of the greatest wine in the entire world is produced right here in the USA. While we should be celebrating and promoting and enjoying this fact throughout the land, instead this information seems to be reserved for the select few: those with money, wine snobs, patrons of snooty fine dining establishments. When people want wine, they settle for what's at the grocery store or maybe something that Robert Parker, the man with the golden palate and creator of the infamous 100 point wine rating scale, recommendeds, because it's easier than getting judged by wine elitists.

I'm here to say enough is enough! There's no reason why people should be intimidated by wine. And I see it on an everyday basis at the restaurant I work at. People will act apologetic about their lack of wine knowledge or they will act immediately defensive about it, based on past experience. Some avoid wine all together for these reasons which is a shame. There are so many great things about wine. First of all, there are so many different types. Even most wine experts get tripped up from time to time because of this. Chances are, maybe you didn't like something you tried in the past, but there is a decent chance that somewhere out there is fermented grape juice that you'll love. That's half the fun of it!

Of course it goes great with food. But it doesn't have to be reserved for 5 star dining. I'll drink wine with anything. Chardonnay and In-and-Out burgers go really well together. Have you tried fried chicken and sparkling wine? Magical! Wine with Hot Pockets? I've never tried it, but why the hell not? Some combinations will work, some are bound to not be as good, but it's fun to be pleasantly surprised, and it's fun to take chances once in awhile.

And wine is a great social beverage. Like all alcoholic drinks, it loosens people up. It makes you want to talk, to spout grand plans, to conquer the world. It makes everyone more attractive and music more vibrant and dance-worthy. At least in my own experience, wine, more so than beer and especially more so than hard liquor, has a way of creating warm feelings, possibility, bonding, and happiness. It's the perfect beverage for social gatherings.

And so the point of this blog will highlight what makes wine so fun. It'll be about accessibility and enjoyment. It'll be about the social experience of wine, especially when the video podcast gets rolled out. More on that later. I want to highlight the people that are making wine that is affordable, yet interesting and accessible. I want to highlight wine stores and wine bars that are friendly and welcoming to everyone, not just wine snobs. And not only that, I want to know how they are making wine fun and accessible. I want to learn about local wines and those on the cutting edge of the industry.

I write this as someone with no wine certifications. I am not a sommelier, nor do I plan on becoming one. I have a decent amount of wine knowledge, but am by no means an expert. So I want to write what I learn as I go and hopefully share it in a way that is helpful to people who want to learn as well. I think learning about wine is fun and I want to present my experiences in a way that encapsulates this spirit. I'm not going to do the 100 point rating system. In my opinion, this system is horribly flawed. My palate and your palate and Robert Parker's palate are different. So even if Parker can detect flavors found only in the existential realm, it doesn't help me one bit because I don't have his palate. Something he pans may very well turn out to be my favorite. Something I may love, may be as pleasant to you as drinking paint thinner.

So rather than be the source for all-things-wine-ratings, I want to be a source for finding new avenues to explore wine. I want to provide you with interesting producers. I want to provide unexpected, but everyday useful, types of pairings. I want to bring you profiles of those people who really get it. Not just those who give lip service to actually getting it, but those who really do! And while most of the time, I want to keep the tone positive, I will call out wine douchery when I see it. There's no place for it anymore.

Expect the podcast to be ridiculous. Not only will we drink wine and talk about wine, but we'll enjoy ourselves far too much. I want it to be about that wonderful social side of wine. I hope to have special guests playing music and doing comedy or whatever else might fit. It'll be a wine podcast with a twist...the twist being it'll actually be fun rather than just watching one or two dudes swirling their glasses around and giving it a grade like they're scoring an algebra exam or something.

I want to be absolutely clear that I respect the wine world. I think there are some really great sommeliers out there who don't believe in talking down to people. And I respect the history of wine and the culture of wine and the supreme talents of grape growers and wine makers. That being said, it's time to get a little punk rock about the wine world. It's time to celebrate everything that makes it fun. It's time to go out and find bottles that anybody can afford and anybody can enjoy, whether you're having grilled rack of lamb or Ramen noodles with a side of Spam for dinner.

The wine revolution starts here and now. And it's based on the spirit, not of $1000 bottles of Bordeaux, but rather on the spirit of how it was most likely discovered in the first place. One of our gatherer ancestors probably left a bunch of freshly picked grapes out and yeast managed to do what it does...change the grape's fermentable sugar into alcohol. What a glorious discovery that must have been! The harsh, unforgiving life of early humans was suddenly a lot more pleasant and hopeful, I'm sure.

So with that, I hope you'll join me as a fellow wine punk to discover more hope and pleasantries that the world of wine has to offer. And to those who may disagree, that's fine, but please oh please, for the love of God and fermentable sugars, I say this to you in all sincerity: Don't be a douche, wine is fun!